The Rock and Roll Report Band of the Week is The Them

Four Maniacs Making Music

It all started one hot summer in Seattle. It was there, in the stultifying doldrums of the Northwest that THE THEM coagulated from a puddle of vomit, beer and semen to form the Unholy alliance that would spread a disease throughout the Northwest. THE THEM’s current mutation comes in the form of Joseph Christ on Vocals, Jimmy Beam on Guitars, Sethalicious on Bass.

Since their appearance THE THEM have been bloodying up stage and audience with their fabulously toxic musical alchemy, a putrefied mixture of horror punk, hardcore, metal and rockabilly, resonating behind the depraved rantings of a madman, coupled with blood and brain matter, and an intensity of personal charisma not seen since vats of grape Kool-Aid were gulped down in Jonestown. THE THEM are here and they require you to accept them as your personal Savior.

The band is now in the process of playing and recording so for now you will have to placate yourselves by attending their live shows, where the pestilence and anomalies of the space-time continuum string themselves together and fuck with your DNA so that, if you are drunk enough, you leave a profoundly changed person. The band does not guarantee that this change will be for the better.

The description above is The Thems self-written profile, I left it as is because it is so descriptive. You’ve got to know what you’re dealing with after all. The Them, from Seattle, USA claim to be four maniacs making music. They have a great ‘tongue in cheek’ fun style. Rock oozing with punk rock style with a good dose of psychobilly thrown in to enhance the mix, it Rocks. The best way to find out exactly would be to download the ‘They Rise’ EP for free via their website

Track one, titled ‘We Killed Betty Page’ is an absolute cracker. It has Offspring style choral vocal harmonies with a strong hint of the cramps thrown in. Track two ‘Drag You Down’ opens with a great bass riff followed by guitar and drums then a guttural blood curdling scream, way to go Joseph. It then thrashes on in fine style, showing two sides of Mr. Christs vocal capabilities. He can go from a coarse hardcore style to harmonic Rock. Track three ‘They Rise’ belts along again, with some more of those joyous backing vocals. It has a slightly darker feel as the title suggests but does not fail to engage. Track four ‘Bury the Hatchet’ is a real power ball of a song. It rolls along raising its frantic intentions all the way. Then stops abruptly with a drum roll followed by a whoop from within the studio, yee har. Track five ‘ Demon Dance’ is all of the previous four tunes styles synergised into something with quite a different feel. Slow, deep and heavy, especially during the chorus.

This could be a great stadium tune, these guys are quality.

Enjoy this free download of They Rise courtesy of The Them and The Rock and Roll Report!

Intense Nick


  1. The Them is one of the great punk bands of this century. I have known them and been a fan of theirs for several years. They perform regularly at my venue & are deserving of everything good that may come their way. Listen to them, better yet, see them, and you will be hooked.

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